Disconnect to Connect

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Recently, I gave up all of my social media accounts. Sort of a "sabbatical" from social media (other than LinkedIn). to sum it up in two words, it has been life changing. Here's a quick synopsis of how the process has gone. 

Before I gave up the "social media game," I spent a lot of time on apps such as Instagram and Facebook. My girlfriend even roped me in to getting a Pinterest (but I don't mention that to anyone). Before bed, I would spend 30 minutes to an hour browsing these apps. While waiting for class, I would mindlessly scroll, and while waiting for a friend in the sub, I would check my notifications. It became a filler for my brain when there was not enough occupying it. Instead of using my imagination, thinking about my feelings, or talking to people around me, I closed off and looked at my phone. I was "addicted" to my phone. I needed my phone to satisfy what I thought was the "mundanity" of life.  

Recently I have realized how much I relied on my phone to capture my attention. When you don't have social media is the only time in which you can finally notice how much you were on it. The Binge Breaker by Bianca Bosker describes this addiction to your smart phone beautifully.

Did you know that social media designers specifically design their pages to satisfy basic human needs? 

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 It's true. 

Those little red circles that show a notification? They're red because that triggers attention. Likes? those trigger dopamine (a major reward for the human brain), and because all social media involve the social aspect, they trigger the innate need for humans to be socially accepted. According to this article by Bosker, that notification you think will take a second to check, ends up taking you - on average - 25 minutes to get back to your original task. Moreover, not knowing when you are going to receive those dopamine triggering notifications, leads to incessant checking of your phone. Now let me relate this to my life. 

Every night before I went to bed, I had it in my mind that I would check my social media accounts for a bit before falling asleep. Often times an hour would go by and I would still be scrolling in the bottom-less pit that is Facebook. Thus, I go to bed an hour earlier now that I don't have anymore accounts. To add to this, my study breaks often included social media, resulting in my study breaks being hours longer than I had originally imagined them. These are only two examples of the time Facebook, and Instagram took away from me. 

In fact, I am currently writing this blog because I have nothing else to do. All of my homework is done, and I had nothing else to do but write. I didn't mindlessly open the Instagram app and explore it, like I had grown so used to doing. 

I was free.

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Regardless of the social media app deletions and time I have saved, there are still some downsides.

I still find substitutes in order to satisfy my entertainment "need." I now spend my time with games on my phone. One particular baseball game, WGT MLB has especially sparked my interest, and has basically taken over for Instagram. 

Along with substitutions, I have found that I am way out of the loop. Social media was my main source of news, because I lack cable television. As it turns out the Cubs and the Indians are in the World Series this year (a fact I had to learn from my girlfriend), and my fantasy football team is seriously struggling since the start of my sabbatical. 

With all this said, the substitutions can be stopped. The facts that I am missing from not being on social media can be found out in different ways, and the lack of entertainment can be fulfilled by talking to people around me. Woah! human interaction. 

Novel concept.

The fact of the matter is that while Facebook, Instagram, and other social media accounts keep you "connected," they also disconnect you from what is right in front of you. Phones can be used to text real people, to make plans, or to catch up with a long-time friend. Once those apps, those games, and your phone in general starts getting in the way of human interaction, something must change. I made that change; I fully support and completely recommend you do the same. 

Disconnect to connect. 

I'll update you with more stories of how this sabbatical is changing my life next time.

Until then...

Goodbye

What's Important?

Recently, I was assigned to read a book in one of my classes. The Little Red Book of Selling has many interesting points. One of these that struck me was the idea that your work-day starts the night before. The author Jeffrey Gitomer, says that instead of watching TV at night, you should be reading/studying in order to become a better salesman. He states that if you want to be successful you need to put other things aside, become a student of sales, and continue to become more of an expert. How often in our lives are we so inundated with homework, or studying, that we lose touch with the relationships in our lives? How easy is it to not see your friends and instead go to work in order to succeed, and in the end how successful are you actually?

I don't know about you, but I find my happiness in people. I find that when I am so busy with school or work and I don't get to hang with my roommates for several days - like so often happens in college - I don't feel success. This got me thinking even more.

Looking towards the future, I hear that careers are hard. I hear that they take a lot of work and dedication, and that you have to find a way to set yourself apart from all other people looking for that one job. How do you balance this hard work, with the relationships that you currently have? Is it worth taking all the time out of your day to succeed in your job even if your relationship is lacking?

My conclusion is that you need to find your priorities in life. For me, the relationships that I have with friends, with my girlfriend, with my family are the most important things to me. No matter how much demand school has on my time, no matter how much I need to do something at work; if those people need me there for them, there is no second guessing.

It's easy to say that, but when it comes down to it, if you have a paper due the next day it is obviously the priority. How do you stop school from becoming to much of a hassle? I am a person who wants to succeed, and get good grades, so I can't just shrug off my responsibilities though I often want to, and I can't devote all of my time to school because I simply wouldn't be happy. There is so much stress out there to go to college, to get a good job, and to make good money. So my question to everyone out there: how do you find the balance between what is important? and what needs to be done?

Let me know.

The Mundanity of Life

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Slower and slower, I sluggishly drug my legs to the next step. My lungs were burning, and I was completely out of breath. As the top neared a wave of relief washed over my body, and I got my second wind. It was then that everything disappeared; I blacked out for a second. The next thing I knew I was standing on the fourth floor of the Jake Jabs College of Business and Entrepreneurship. 

I'll admit, this is a slight exaggeration, but by golly, there are a lot of stairs in that building. Luckily, I am not that out of shape, though I am approaching that state scarily fast. To be fair, this may be the result of not working out for some time. It seems that once things start happening, life starts moving a little to quickly to take a step back and do the things that are the best for me. After a long day of school, a nice "relaxed" game of Fifa on the Xbox sounds a little... no, a lot better than changing clothes and working out. Justifiably, Fifa raises the heart rate quite a bit, so its basically the same as going for a run... right?

Thats what I thought.

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Yesterday I had an epiphany. I was sick of the mundanity of life. I was sick of waking up, going to school, going home until work, and then doing homework after. This isn't the point of life. I've also realized, and it's sadly obvious, that my lack of breath when walking around was from my lack of physical exercise - who knew?

Days were long, and it was rare that I retained enough energy to get through it. Again, working out is proven to give you more energy. If you don't believe me, check out this dope article from WebMD - and no this won't diagnose you with some incurable illness as WebMD often does (hopefully).

I hopped up from my bed, though I was very comfortable. Then I promptly laid back down. I then deleted all my social media accounts off of my phone and hopped up from my bed again. Let's all be honest with ourselves for a second and realize those darned things are just a waste of time. That realization coupled with the fact that my last Instagram photo got 149 likes was enough to call it quits.

I had hit the peak.

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After these first changes I drove to the gym. Worked out till I couldn't anymore (not very long). Returned home and rearranged my room, as a symbol. I cracked a beer and sat down to finish the homework I had for the night. By the end of it all, I laid my head down on my pillow (cold-side of course). A wave of relief washed over me once again. Kind of like the one that occurred when I neared the top of the stairs in Jabs, but much more powerful. A real relief.

The mundanity of life no longer weighed on my shoulders, and I was free from the anxiety I had felt the whole past week. I set my alarm for 7:30, even though I didn't need to wake up. When it went off, I snoozed it for an hour, but its the thought that counts... right?

My point of this all? find the things that make you happy - the things that make you feel accomplished - and do those things, even if they sound awful at the time. Muster the courage and grab life by the horns. This is how you avoid the mundanity of life.

Deuces

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Avoiding the Writer's Block

Writing a blog is not an easy task, and to make it even more difficult, every time you write one, you have to come up with a new topic. In an effort to come up with a new topic for this weeks blog, I found a website with a Blog Topic Generator. I suggest you go check it out if you are having trouble figuring out what to write.

In effort to help my readers avoid the writer's block, I have come up with five of my own ways to generate some topics to write a blog about. So here you go:

1. Get Outside 

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This may be something that only helps me, nevertheless, I find that when I am outside and actually taking in the world around me, I find numerous topics to write about. I recommend that you take a step-back, have a mini out-of-body experience, and see everything as a possible topic. Once you come upon something you want to write about, jot it down on a notes page and continue searching.

Let's be honest, the world is full of interesting things, and its a beautiful place... so get out there, check it out, and then write about it.

2. Dream 

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No, it's not as cheesy as it sounds.

We all have dreams while we are sleeping, and while some of them more interesting than others, they are always good to write about. When you have a dream you remember, write about it. Write about what happened in it, who was in it, and most importantly what the dream could mean. The American Phycological Association found that often times your subconscious plays a large role in your dreams. That decision you haven't made yet, could actually be influenced by the dreams you are having. So make an effort to remember those dreams, and then interpret what that could mean. This is a simple way to come up with a topic for a blog, and something that could be interesting for readers, as well as yourself.

3. Read a book

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Often times when you read a book, you learn something new. This year in school, we read a book about choices. Writing the blog after reading the book helped me interpret what I learned more critically. It helped me understand what I learned on a deeper level, and it forced me to put the topics discussed in the book, into real-life scenarios that related to my life. Write a blog about an interesting book you just read, read more critically, and then write about the topics and how they affect your life; it can make for an interesting read.

4. Teach people 

Another super interesting read is about how to do something. Your special talents, and things you know how to do make for a great blog topic. Teaching people how to do something is both beneficial to the reader, and you. The reader learns something they may not have known, and you get to write about something you are passionate about. Take a step back, look at the things in your life that others may not know, and then teach them through your blog.

5. Learn something 

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My last suggestion is to learn something, and then write about it. Find something you are passionate about, learn about it, and then write about that process. Inform your readers of things you found interesting, or just simply want to share. This is an interesting topic for readers, and a win-win in the fact that you are learning about something you are passionate about.

Hope these five ways help you find something great to write about. Would love to hear your thoughts, and your own ways of coming up with something to write about.

Till then...

See-ya